“Write.”
but God I don't want to write. I feel incapable. The words are unreachable.
“Write.”
so often when I feel incapable of writing
is when
the nudge to write is the closest.
bucking against nudges never breathes benefits.
i will sit.
listen.
breathe.
i will type.
im thinking about december
i loved the invader of snow
that blew across this brown land last week.
now it’s starting to feel alot like Christmas.
the branches, the horizon, the earth-
it's all quite magical looking.
the horefrost is comment-worthy
in the mornings
the bulging planner
dares to deny
much more to be squished in.
gingerbread is my new fav flavouring.
greenery is brought in and tucked amoung house interior.
enough small talk -
here's what's big in my head at the moment...
it cracks me up honeslty...
this month is such a demanding month
and yet its suppose to be the jolliest time of the year.
i think people operate rather comically during this month.
we all carry on
as if we are carrying life well.
balanced.
we all show up
with no show of discomfort on the face.
we all just pretend
we know what we are doing
and where we're going
but really?
hearts are heavy
especially now
this season is not always merry…
many souls ache the deepest this month.
i want to be sensitive to that.
i want to be a safe place for brokenness.
i want to acknowledge chilly challenges.
on sunday the minister talked about
God’s promises.
they are sturdy. they are true. they are hope.
then we sang
Standing on the Promises of God.
i needed those words.
i feel deeply weak,
like zilch strength exists in me.
i need Jesus.
we all do.
d e s p e r a t e l y
perhaps in the weakest
He's working the deepest
vulnerability is actually so rich.
if we welcome it.
the great Brene Brown said,
''vulnerbility is not weakness. vulnerability is the accurate measurement of courage.''
thats powerful. i needed that reminder.
im enrolled in the junior classes of vulnerabilty school.
if you too want to embrace both the magicalness and the brokenness in this season, im hanging out right there with you.
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